This mistake is killing your creativity (and you don’t even realize it)

Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash

“Are you having fun?”

It’s early on a drizzly Monday morning. My friend Anthony peers at me over his piping hot McCafé. He’s a fellow business owner and I’m filling him in on my first four months of creating on Substack when his question breaks through my monologue.

Am I having fun? I wonder.

I think he senses my pause.

Because before I can answer he says, “if you’re not having fun, that’s on you.”

Oof.

"Rough, man…go easy on me." I say as he pins me with a crystal blue gaze. He's silent as he waits for a better answer.

“Yes, maybe…well sometimes.”

Super, Ashley. Way to knock that out of the park.

He chuckles into his coffee. The conversation moves on, but his question doesn’t. We say our goodbyes, and as I drive home it continues bouncing around my brain.

I am terrified to admit that I’ve not been enjoying myself as much as I want to.

Not because creating on Substack isn’t fun, but because I’m scared that I’m repeating past mistakes.

When I started my last business, initially I had fun. I was meeting tons of people, having new experiences, and providing opportunities for employees. But the fun slipped away as success became more serious.

My happiness was tied to the money we were making and how quickly we were growing. And in the blur of going from a few thousand bucks to seven figures, the fun disappeared entirely.

But I didn’t just lose the fun. I lost the point.

And I’ve found myself drifting into an old pattern with Substack too.

When I started here, the purpose was play.

Then someone asked when I was going to monetize my page and I felt that familiar tightening in my belly.

My creativity didn’t slow down. It dropped dead.

My next posts began to feel less like me. I couldn’t seem to get what I wanted to say out. And I constantly worried whether there was even a point to all of this.

Four months in and I ended up an absolute wreck.

All because I let someone put a price tag on my playground.

So when Anthony asked if I was having fun, I fumbled the answer.

But when I got home that day, I realized fun isn't something you stumble into. It's something you choose, the same way you'd choose a revenue goal.

So I sat down and decided to answer these questions:

• What on Substack brings me joy?

• What on Substack feels like scraping nails down a chalkboard?

Then I focused on the steps I can take to reconnect with what I love and reframe the parts I don’t. Now, I come back to these questions weekly.

I’m not suggesting that everything is suddenly rainbows and unicorns, but it feels like I am getting back on the right track.

And if you feel like the fun has disappeared in your business too, when did you decide to stop playing? No one changed the playground. Maybe you just started patrolling it like a principal with your clipboard in hand and a whistle-blowing problem.

Because it’s easy to let the seriousness creep in. To get hung up on the next promotion or strive toward the next revenue goal.

But you only get one shot at this life.

So whether you’re building the career, a business, or a family…

Choosing to have fun is just as important as going after the next goal.

Because it makes you more effective and keeps you from crashing out.

So remember to go play.

Here’s to having fun,

Ashley

PS — You might think you’re too busy to focus on fun but doing this work now is how you become less busy because you start working on the right things. Play is a great indicator of where you’ll excel. Which is the difference between working for ten years and getting stuck at the first revenue ceiling and continuing to scale.